A Good Mom?

So Kasper is now 14 months old. I'd like to say I feel more like a pro-mom but lately feelings of inadequacy and guilt keep on surfacing. I know I have to take away some of these feelings, and it helped today that I read a babycentre bulletin that said:

"There's not much to do but accept that sometimes he'll act needy and other times he'll ignore you.'

But these feelings are still hard to shake. I love the work that I do, and it gives me great pleasure. I love that Kasper is very independent and plays well with most children and adults. I love that he does not whine for a certain person to hold him and can be very easily comforted....BUT it's hard when after a busy day at work, that he doesn't necessarily want to PLAY with me. And if he does, he likes playing games where you swing him or piggy back him, and my body just can't physically handle it right now. And then he chooses to play with somebody else. :( I wish he could say right now "Mommy, I love you." and then I would feel alright. I think...

Sigh...then there's this passage that seems to loom over me. I know God doesn't mean it to loom over me. It's supposed to be a goal, an encouragement, a model...but I feel so short from it. I think I need some ice cream.

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.

¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.

¹² She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

¹³ She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.

¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.

¹⁵ She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.

¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.

¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.

¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.

²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

²² She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.

²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.

²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.

²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:

²⁹ "Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."

³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Another Day in Taiwan

So we've been in Taiwan for almost 3 years. We know where to get groceries, find good restaurants, find doctors & dentists, how to drive around the city (well Ray does anyways)... life is definitely more regular now.

Contracts for school came out. Time to decide again whether to sign on the dotted line and stay another year or not. Should we leave the comforts of Taiwan? Return to the comforts of Canada? or something else....

I need an ice cream.

Almost 1!

Yesterday our staff went to our traditional Friday at Friday's dinner.

At the end of the 1st week of school it's our school's way to celebrate the beginning of the school year AND the survival of the 1st week.

During the dinner, many of my co-workers jokingly reminded us about how at the same time last year, my belly was super big and Kasper was ready to pop out. My maternity leave began the following Monday but I was so sure that Kasper was going to be late and would not come out until a week later. That night after Friday's, my co-workers and I got a wonderful hairwash and the next morning at 7am my water broke. I guess I wasn't ready yet (we hadn't even packed for the hospital yet), but Kasper sure was.

It's a been a year already and God has definitely taught us a lot through Kasper. When you have a baby, you realize how selfish you've been your whole life. All decisions you make when you're not a parent are really your own. Sure they might be influenced by other factors like parents, friends, circumstances. But when you have a child you NEED to consider them because they are helpless without your decisions and actions. They can't feed themselves, bathe, or move without your help.

Luckily, Kasper has been a SUPERSTAR baby. He sleeps well, laughs lots, and loves to cuddle. I'm so thankful for this year that we've had.

Hun Li (婚禮)

So we attended our FIRST Taiwanese wedding today. It was Ray's co-worker's wedding. It was a very pleasant experience. Why you might ask?

1. Food was EXCELLENT! Probably one of the best Chinese Banquet meals I've ever had. And for lunch too! I definitely could have eaten seconds for some of the dishes. :) Especially the abalone. The TWO courses we had it!

2. No games. (definite plus for Ray)

3. Got to meet Ray's co-workers in a more non-work environment. (Although there was still some shop talk going on)

4. Not too long. :) Definite plus so we could make it back to feed Kasper again.

All in all it was a great cultural experience. Although the dress code for the wedding was definitely very interesting. Some people came in jeans, most in business casual dress, and then some in formal. Ray & I arrived in formal dress at the same time as some of the more casually dressed people and had a horrible "Oh no! We're totally out of place!" moment at first. But we thankfully fit in with the attire at our table so we felt much better. =P

Being here in Taiwan we've definitely missed a lot of weddings. Where we used to average 10 weddings a year, we've dwindled down to 1/year now. I like attending weddings. I don't really need to dress up anymore so it's nice to do it once in a while. Plus I always find weddings remind me of my own wedding day and that's a happy place to be. :)

Sorry to all those whose weddings we've missed over the years. You were definitely on our hearts.

Upgrades are awesome!

We just came back from our trip to Ho Chi Minh city. It was admittedly a bit risque given that H1N1 is still active but it was nice to get away and go on a little trip as a family and the food was AWESOME! Pho everyday...grilled meats with lemongrass...ice creams...stingray.

We decided to avoid the backpacking adventures and splurged on a 4-star hotel for the week, but the best part was our room got upgraded to an executive suite because they didn't have any other large beds available. The room was still a bit run-down compared to hotels like the Hyatt, but the best part about the upgrade was that we had access to the executive lounge! If you've never had that before it's quite the treat! Imagine free food and drinks ALL DAY!

So our days ended up being ...wake up late...breakfast buffet...trip to the market or a site...back around 3pm to feed Kasper and hang out in the lounge...dinner at restaurant...play with Kasper before sleeping.

Too bad Ray has to go back to work. Boo hoo! :( Everybody should have summers off!

Here are some pictures of Daddy & Kasper enjoying the lounge. The funny thing was that we were the only ones there enjoying the service & food everyday! Our own private lounge. :)

My 1st Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's out there!

It really is QUITE shocking that I'm a mom. Ray and I still marvel everyday that Kasper is a REAL living and breathing person! God truly is amazing!

Well I decided to start a new tradition for Mother's Day too! I say "too" because many of my friends here in Taiwan have family traditions, and they've convinced me that having family traditions are really important. They're not only fun, but they build memories and reference points. They also help build a sense of bond within your family. I know this is true because throughout my childhood, my WuCheng family have built countless family traditions that I will never forget (e.g. sleepovers at Big Uncle's 大伯, TVCW, Old Toy Trains, making dumplings, picking peaches and pears, Science olympics).

So, after MD proclaimed her new Mother's Day tradition (which was to go to the beach), I decided to declare mine too!

From here on in, the Chow's will take mom out to eat Ice Cream! And it has to be GOOD ice cream! Not some soft serve cone at McDonald's.

This year we had Coldstone's. Yummy! I had the Monkey Bites (picture not shown below).

Hairwashes

Okay this blog entry is for my friend M who keeps joking about my lack of cultural immersion because my 1st hairwash was the day before I delivered Kasper.

Well....I'm proud to say that I'm now at 3 hairwash experiences now...2 1/2 years later.

So here's some background. Back in Canada it is just not common to go to a salon and get a hairwash. I mean get a blow dry or a style sure...but a hairwash?! They just stick you in a sink and put fancy shampoo on you. Nothing special. I would definitely NOT pay $20+ to get a hairwash at a salon. So coming to Taiwan, I didn't think much of getting a hairwash either!

But then, after working at Bethany, I kept hearing about my colleagues going to get a hairwash every 2-3 weeks. I just didn't get it! I mean spending money on great food I can understand, but on a hairwash?!!!

Well...it was not until my first hairwash the day before Kasper was born did I BEGIN to understand. In Taiwan, and I think in Asia, it's a totally different experience. They sit you down on a chair, squirt shampoo in your hair and then gently massage you for a good 15-20 minutes while you're relaxing, chatting with your friends, enjoying some shut-eye, sipping tea, or reading a magazine. Then you get another little massage treatment at the sink, and then to top it off, you get a nice little styling for your hair. I'm not sure if you saw my day before labour picture but my hair was looking PRE-TTY nice that day. Here it is, just in case you missed it.



However, as nice as it was, $260NTD (~$9 Cdn) still seemed a bit extravagant for me so I haven't gone much since. Until I found out there was a place doing it for $100NTD (~$4 Cdn). This is the deal-hunting side of me getting all excited. Well, I decided to try it out with 2 co-workers one day. Let's just say...it was pretty close to the hairwash experiences in Canada. It was NOT great!

I felt like I really needed to redeem myself from this totally "lemon" experience and so 3 weeks ago I think I found it. This salon called "Bess" had a HUGE sign advertising $99NTD for a hairwash, every Monday-Thursday from 1-3pm. I mean, for being so specific it HAS to be pretty good right?

Well M braved the storm with me today, and we had MD join us too. It was not as great as the $260NTD one, but I think I've redeemed myself. It was a pretty good deal. Nice massage, good sink wash experience (massage chair), tea included, but only so-so styling.

I would say...I FOUND my deal! :) Yay!

Another Milestone in Learning Chinese?

Thanks to everyone who has been asking how the presentations went. As mentioned in the earlier post, March 20th and March 26th were two significant external client facing formal presentations on a technical topic I was very insecure about. I've been doing presentations on a smaller scale with clients, and certainly presentations to students and internal employees - this was different. Perhaps its psychological - another milestone or mental breakthrough in the language journey.

How did it go? I don't know. After the March 20th presentation I didn't feel like "I nailed that one" ... but at the same time I didn't feel like I need to dig a hole and bury my head in it (that feeling does happen from time to time). In the end, I know I didn't do great, but considering my current language ability and the graciousness of the Taiwanese audience, it could have been a lot worse. They know I am obviously not a native Chinese speaker and fortunately, I'm speaking from the perspective of sharing international experience.

The Chairman of the Accounting Research Foundation did say to me in a lunch the following week that while he missed my session, he heard it was one of the best ones. I'm not taking this too seriously as it could just be Chinese courtesy!

I did notice I have felt a little more confident in formal presentations since this date. Again, a mental breakthrough. Still have lots to go in the language learning journey.

Tomorrow I get to have dinner with 12 Partners from the other Big 4 (our competitors) on the topic of Quality & Risk Management - have to brush up on more technical terms!

Here's some press coverage of the March 26th event we held:

Random signage

Just thought I'd share some funny signage I've seen in Taiwan lately.

This was an Owl Crossing sign we saw while hiking on Yangmingshan for the Calla Lillies.



This one was seen very close to our apartment across from a school. It's graffiti, which makes the content of the graffiti really interesting.

Among the Flowers

In February I had the opportunity to finally go to Yangmingshan and see the calla lillies. For 2 years we've heard about how you can go up to the mountain and pick your own callas in the field, but every year, we miss it. So I was really excited to finally make it out.

Ray decided to stay at home with Kasper and have some father/son time. A good thing too because the fog was so heavy, we all felt like we were walking behind a waterfall. Needless to say, my hair was super frizzy and out of control, and we were all very wet.

BUT...here I am...among the flowers!



Here's the group of us. Cold & wet, but happy to have been "Among the Flowers"! :)

2009會計新紀元-迎接IFRS接軌之挑戰--議程確認

Can't read or follow the subject title of this blog? Don't worry, I can't fully follow it either!

Continuing in the spirit of fast paced, challenging and new opportunities - I continue to get more and more responsibilities. One of my external market facing responsibilities is being the IFRS leader for Taiwan. IFRS standard for International Financial Reporting Standards, which basically are a set of internationally accepted accounting standards that is different from the existing accounting rules in many countries (including Taiwan, Canada and US). At the same time, most of these countries will be adopting IFRS in the years to come. For Taiwan this is a significant change and from an accounting firm perspective, potentially could create significant service (and revenue) oppportunities for us.

Compared to two years ago I am significantly more comfortable speaking in Chinese. Don't be fooled - its all relative and you have to keep in mind I had very very little before coming here. I'm personally very happy and surprised at my progress.. It's been great, but challenging.. Learning languages has required bold moves in terms of trying to speak, being vulnerable, etc. Quite contrary to my natural personality or preference, but learning Chinese was a key objective of being out here.

Daily conversation in the workplace is one thing... speaking in front of strangers and groups is another. I'm already way over my head conducting business in Chinese, speaking in front of students, teaching classes, etc. For the most part, these have been internal meetings or when external, its been in smaller groups where people can understand that I will have an accent, make mistakes and have limited vocabulary.

Well friends, I want to ask you to pray for me... yes, to pray for a very practical but perhaps not so significant in the grand scheme of things (egthis may not change lives in the foreseeable future)... however, I'm scared.

Next week, I'm representing our firm at a fairly significant conference. It's held by the Accounting Research Foundation in Taiwan, one of the key standard setters. Almost all of the key regulators, academia, our competitors and key senior finance people (CFO types) will be at this conference. They're coming to hear the latest news and views from the "experts" on how Taiwan will adopt these new accounting standards.

I get to do a presentation and then participate in a panel. Will I even catch the question correctly?

Oh.. in case you haven't figured it out, this is all in Chinese... and today they told me that the session is oversold and will have over 400 people in attendance. This is front page financial media stuff in Taiwan - the equivalent of a SEC conference in the US or a CICA conference in Canada.

My slides are still not done as the content is already hard to get right (in English)... how and why am I the best choice to do this?

Help!

If this wasn't enough, I'm also the Technology Industry Leader for our firm in Taiwan. What does this mean? Who knows - perhaps it means that I'm the leader who will bring the best thought leadership, subject matter expert and industry experiences to our technology clients. Taiwan has a very long, successful and mature history in the technology industry... how do I do this other job? Well.. another plea and prayer for another day.

Happy Birthday to Me...

So today was my birthday. I'm not usually one for big grandiose celebrations for my birthday, but I must admit, I also don't like it being like any other day either. I guess this makes it always a little bit tricky for Ray cause he doesn't really know what I'm thinking and how to proceed. Hopefully by the time we've been married 20 years he will have figured me out! ;)

So how did my day go today? Well...let's say it was like dark chocolate (a little bitter, but also very sweet).

It started off being quite good as we had our regular playdate for Kasper and E. That is always an adorable time. But then when we went to the Warner Vieshow theatre the lines were so long that it was not even worth lining up for a ticket. I was really sad about that. I thought my birthday would be boring and ruined for sure!

But Ray saved the day! Hooray! Just as I was about to wallow in my sorrow, Ray persevered and cheered me up by convincing me to go check out Big Tom's ice creamerie. It was recommended by this "hungry girl in Taipei" blog. Although the ice cream was not all that she raved about, the ice cream did make me feel a lot better. Plus resting in front of the pond at Sun Yat Sen Memorial just made me feel warm and fuzzy again.

Next, we decided to go on a little bit of an adventure by exploring a part of Taipei that we had never been to. So we ended up going to the Youth Park. Last season when Amazing Race came to Taiwan, one of the challenges took place at the Youth Park, so it was stuck in my mind. During the race, the competitors had to go barefoot across this long foot massage path. Well, I decided to look for the exact same footpath and walk across it! I was so glad we did this! The park was peaceful, beautiful, and clean.



And...here I am walking across the footpath!



Okay! Not super adventurous, but good enough for an extra-ordinary day for me! :)

Thank God!...and thanks to Ray!

Blessings

Feeling very thankful and blessed in a way that warrants more than a quick Facebook status update.

We still haven't had a chance to post pictures about our new apartment (we moved in around July). Beyond the physical comforts of a nicer view (we live on 23rd floor in a dense city that has mostly low and mid-rises), a bigger place (bigger than we need), lots of natural sunlight (did I mention we live on the 23rd floor and can see pretty much three sides of the building - North, West and South) and garbage on each floor (see this link), we have also been blessed by our landlords.

We talked about previous landlord (where we spent 18 months) S. S has always been a great landlord and with her living downstairs, it was always easy to ask her questions about life in Taiwan and get things fixed. S has since become a great friend and supporter. She has twin children and she's been very gracious in sharing handme down strollers, clothes and other great things. We'll be seeing her and her family for dinner soon and look forward to a lifelong friendship!

Our current landlady is also great although she doesn't live in our building. Hearing "horror stories" (sorry M!) about other landlords, we feel so thankful for her. She has completely gone out of her way to make sure we have everything we need even though we negotiated an "as is" rent and "partially furnished" apartment (we pretty much only had to buy our own couch, dresser and wardrobe). Last November we asked her about leaky windows and she came over to insulate them for us and then decided that our semi-enclosed balcony where we have our washer and dryer should have a proper window so we can have it cleaner (this is in a culture and country where you commonly see clothes hanging out ledges and windows)!

The other day our old tube TV broke. We called her to see if this has happened before and she sent up the superintendent of our building right away who quickly concluded the TV was done. Coming home from work tonight, it was a pleasant surprise to see a huge brand new TV sitting in our hallway - a brand new LCD HDTV that's bigger and (obviously) better than our old tube! This is quite unexpected and the landlord is not obligated under the lease we have, not to mention that the economy here in Asia is very bad - unemployment, uncertainty, cost constraints, etc.

Sandra said the other day that God someone continues to chose to bless us beyond belief with small and big things... physical and spiritual... we have never had to worry about anything. So why us? I often wonder about - to those whom much is given, much is expected... This TV is another small thing that will remind us daily that we are truly blessed.

I suppose a followup blog will be how this new relationship with our new landlord will evolve. The Chinese thing to do will be to purchase a nice gift box of fancy fruit and send it over to their house as a Chinese New Year gift and thank you. Hopefully this will be yet more steps to another fruitful relationship!

Off to watch our new TV.

ray

PS: Prior to coming to Taiwan I would have been a little "disappointed" that the TV was not one of the mainstream brands like Sony, Samsung, Panasonic, etc... however now that I'm back serving clients and learning about semi-conductors, LCD panel manufacturers and such... I now know that all of the components are essentially manufactered by the same handful of factories. There really isn't much difference! If Sandra would hear she would quickly critize me for not being grateful and recognizing we're blessed...

Introducing.......!

1. The Peking Duck Pizza!!

Courtesy of Costco cafeteria, Taipei now has 3 choices of pizza when we go to visit the big warehouse store: Hawaiin pizza (very normal), Seafood pizza (a Taiwanese favourite), and now the Peking Duck pizza (who thought up that flavour?!) It's an interesting mixture of Hoisin sauce, onions, smoked duck of some sort, and cheese. It was actually pretty tasty!

Here is a picture of Ray & Kasper (well mostly Ray) enjoying our first bite.



2. The Hiding Place!!!


Thanks to W for pushing me to invite some girls for a Sunday movie in the Library at Bethany, a bunch of us relaxed for an afternoon to watch The Hiding Place. This is an older movie based on the classic Christian book about Corrie Ten Boom. She and her family were Christians who helped many Jewish people hide and escape from the Nazi's during WWII. It's really a great story of love, hope and forgiveness. Definitely read the book if you haven't done that before! :)

My favourite part in the movie AND book is when Corrie Ten Boom asks her father Casper Ten Boom (he was actually another reason why I thought Kasper would be such a great name for our baby...he's such an amazing person and father figure throughout Corrie's life!) a question. Here is the scene:

When he was tucking her into bed that night, Corrie asked: "Papa, what is it like to die?" Papa Ten Boom did not look away from her, but held his gaze into her eyes. "When we go to Amsterdam, when do I give you your ticket?" Corrie considered this well before answering. "Just before we get on the train." Still holding his steady gaze, he said to her: "When the time comes, your Heavenly Father will give you all the strength you need."

Isn't that beautiful and wise? I sure hope I'll have the wisdom to answer questions that Kasper asks me in such a way!